The fundamental sense of being male or female, independent of whether you conform to the social rules of gender, is called gender:

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Gender identity refers to one's internal and individual sense of being male, female, or something else, regardless of the gender norms and roles that society assigns to each gender. Gender typing refers to the process by which children learn the behaviors and attitudes associated with their gender through socialization. Gender schema refers to the mental framework of gender that guides our perception and interpretation of gender-related information. Gender development refers to the complex interplay of biological, psychological, and societal factors that shape an individual's gender identity and expression. Therefore, gender identity is the best choice given the definition provided in the question.

The Fundamental Sense of Being Male or Female, Independent of Whether