Olivia works in the main office at a public elementary school. After only a week on the job, she has been asked to deal with a difficult situation. The kindergarten teachers were finding that many of their students' parents were lingering in their classrooms past the start of the school day, consequently making the emotional transition harder for their children. The parents were also crowding the limited physical space within the classrooms and hallways. Olivia has been asked to draft a notice to be distributed to the kindergarteners' parents to try to rectify this problem. Olivia believes this is a simple enough task and she writes the notice below. Discuss her draft and how you might improve it.
Attention kindergarten parents: Do not remain in your children's classrooms for too long, as this is causing problems.

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The Answer of Olivia works in the main office at a public elementary school. After only a week on the job, she has been asked to deal with a difficult situation. The kindergarten teachers were finding that many of their students' parents were lingering in their classrooms past the start of the school day, consequently making the emotional transition harder for their children. The parents were also crowding the limited physical space within the classrooms and hallways. Olivia has been asked to draft a notice to be distributed to the kindergarteners' parents to try to rectify this problem. Olivia believes this is a simple enough task and she writes the notice below. Discuss her draft and how you might improve it.
Attention kindergarten parents: Do not remain in your children's classrooms for too long, as this is causing problems.

Olivia Works in the Main Office at a Public Elementary